eating strawberries, watching sliders and smiling over a little imaginary life i
you will remember Thor went on a journey to get cashews
he brought back strawberries and cloned them
do they still have seeds?
well i'm not sure
they've turned into red blobs
but they taste great
*gets weird images comparing asgard to strawberries*
*aboard the ship the IMMUNITY*
Thor: I believe this cloned body has a little red tinge now.
Heimdall: Oh dear.
Hermiod: I feel a little green as of late.
nuby: tastes good though
Thor: I only have enough bodies for myself, let alone Nuby's appetite.
*LORD OF THE STRAWBERRIES ENTERS*
LOTS: HOW DARE YOU
YOU WILL PAY
FOR INTERBREEDING STRAWBERRIES AND ASGARDS
elly: don't think about it too much
Caz: Is that even possible?
rodney: don't tell me what not to think or i'll start EWWW
Carson Beckett got out charts and diagrams to explain the biology of it all.
This was the grossest briefing in the history of Tau'ri.
*the goa'uld's in the room raise their hands* and of the gods!
But not for them all.
Teyla had seen worse.
For some reason everyone was on Atlantis.
she's not tau'ri
anyone going to explain how humans populated the pegasus?
Carson Beckett got out diagrams and charts to explain.
"Once upon a time there was an Asgard named Michael Jackson..."
*the windows implode*
eh. *caz grabs chalk*
*bursts into tears*
*nuby eats chalk*
this isn't making sense
Late Nights usually MAKE SENSE
well i've been having weird dreams
i'll be having a nightmare about school
when suddenly Beckett turns to the camera
he says, "DR. CARSON BECKETT"
Caz says, "HYPERCAZ"
*a centaur wanders on to the set*
Centaur: Mars is bright tonight.
elly: you moron, it's venus
*werewolf wanders onto set*
A hush fell over Atlantis.
Zelenka ran down the corridor, nude and covered in petrol.
oma: i got bored of oil
Um. *vainly hits backspace*
Katie Brown saw Zalanka and swooned. Zelenka turned around and fwaped her for thinking
his name wrong.
When in fact Caz had on purposely spelt it wrong for no purpose whatsoever other
than for a space filler.
you know, i have no idea where my cat is...
*elly's cat wandered past Zelenka*
*Zelenka rolled off a balcony*
*on to the WHALE OF DOOM*
rodney: eh, glitch in the matrix
*the previous events repeat themselves*
rodney: dodgy cheap scape
*the previous events repeat themselves*
Caz: Are we on a budget now?
*the backdrop falls over*
elly: couldn't have anything to do with Thor's beaming bill could it?
Thor: My stone was stolen.
elly: there's a difference
ba'al: yeah, thieves return things
Ford: It's the triple breasted whore of Gallumbis 6!
Caz: What the...
Ford: I am the only Ford.
Beckett: Yer no alien from Betelgeuse, son.
Ford: I am many Fords.
*Ford turns into a Ford*
rodney: vroom vroom!
*Rodney pulls out his wand - *
Oma: Put that away before you hurt someone.'
*not THAT wand*
Oma: Of which wand do you speak?
*a magical wand*
*sparks come out the end*
*nuby morphs into new form*
Nuby: *admires himself*
elly: take that off at once! it doesn't do anything for you!
*Nuby now resembles Sam Beckett + the hair*
Caz: Freow. Sam Beckett hair.
*Carson Beckett glares at Nuby*
Daniel: Did someone mention a wand?
Rodney: WAND! REDUCIO!
*Ford shrinks into a mini car*
Rodney: Vroom, vroom. (6)
elly: first warning then i confiscate it!
Oma: I can see through clothing, Dr McKay, and that is not reducio.
elly: BAD RODNEY!
Rodney: I swear elly it's for you.
Caz: Erm, nevermind.
elly: i mean, i'm mad at you!
elly: put ford down at once! no, don't run him into the black hole, that's not very
*Black Hole moves menacingly closer*
Black Hole: I'll take them both
Beckett: *mutters* engorgio
Nuby: CHECK ZIT OUT
elly: OY, get your, um - whatever it is you have away from the assets...
Caz: No no no no
Beckett: I gave him what he finally wanted.
elly: my my, have fun...
Caz: That was bad.
Beckett: I turned him into a tripod.
Ra: Camera? Please let it be a camera.
WHAT DID BECKETT DO!
PUT HIM BACK THE WAY HE WAS!
NO MORE OR LESS
*Beckett muttered engorgio and Nuby became a tripod...*
Ra: *hopefully* Camera?
Oma: Not quite.
*Nuby hobbles around*
elly: i told you nuby, take it off!
Nuby: So am I sexy yet?
nuby: but i'm a real boy!
Nuby: You can leave your hat -
*Daniel kicks Nuby over a...*
*all females* : ow...
*into a wormhole?*
Yoda: Not bad archaeology boy.
Rodney: HEY! I was using that!
thor: *eyes yoda*
Beckett: Relax, it was Ford.
Caz: You made Ford even smaller?
*Yoda eyes Thor*
Thor: Nice lightsabre.
*thor doesn't - we'll let you work out why*
thor: you got nothing
yoda: bite me
yoda: is that a staff?
*Ford turns into a Toyoda*
Banana: Who me?
darn beat me to it
thor: "oh what a feeling...."
Beckett: *eyeing caz* Oh what a feeling.
*VERY BAD ORDER OF WORDS*
Caz: My dear, I think you need a reducio charm in public.
dumbledore: I never taught this.
Beckett: Slytherin :D(6)
*mckay walks up to elly* i don't...
elly: put that away before you hurt yourself or somebody around you
*Mouse runs back to computer*
*replicator walks past with a huge letter R on its back*
*the computer purs*
Beckett: Aye, extremely creepy.
Caz: Um I just found an interesting device.
*the men stand around comparing -um, shoe sizes....*
*women ignore and look at interesting device*
Oma: Oh I remember that.
Caz: What is it?
beckett: *raises eyebrow suggestively*
Oma: Nevermind. I need to find Zelenka and .... use it.
*Caz looks at Beckett*
Caz: You need bigger jeans, my love.
elly: oh pull yourself out of the tree for a second
elly: nah, leave it that way
Nuby: What tree?
*a tree grows out of the ocean*
elly: i might put mckay's through the wash...
Caz: Are we talking about trees or...shoes?
elly: it was a metaphor!
elly: well, monkey's with large um, feet tend to think about things that primitive
tree dwellers think about...
Beckett: My shoe needs a bigger size.
right that made no sense
Beckett: My key needs a lock.
mckay: haha! my feet are bigger than yours
elly: Plural? that's wishful thinking
Daniel: We're not talking about trees and shoes are we?
Oma: Ford's shoes were microscopic when he was his proper size.
teryl: I've come to lay carpet!
*Ford squeaks indignantly*
*Amanda runs screaming*
*Daniel looks at Teryl*
Daniel: I feel I should know you.
Teryl: What's your shoe size?
Daniel: What has that got to do with anything?
elly: HEY! OUT OUT OUT! we lay the carpet around here
Beckett: I really need to lay carpet soon.
teryl: *sigh* was he always a size 8?
mckay: i hope that's not in inches
rodney: what was that for?
elly: living in a tree
Daniel: What the.
Beckett: Trees are nice scratching posts.
Caz: Bloody Furling.
elly: i knew there was a reason asgard measured things in microns
Heimdall: I object. Thor is the most superior Asgard I know.
Caz: Daniel. you're clueless.
*a child wanders into the convo*
*sirens are set off*
*ba'al rocks up* my feet appear to be of quite considerable size
elly: hence why i let you live
Nuby: WHAT IS THAT IT'S HIDEOUS
Nuby: Not you...it!
Ba'al: :@ :@ :@
*child is caged*
*cage is deported*
Caz: Wait I thought nuby was dead..
elly: THOR! I TOLD YOU TO LOCK THE DOOR!
thor: i was preoccupied
yoda: Yeah, with the staff
Caz: Who and the staff exactly?
elly: You can keep that kind of intel to yourself
Thor: The staff.
Heimdall: Interested device.
Thor & Heimdall: (6)
Caz: That's...not right.
Beckett: Aye, not right at all.
*mckay and ba'al advance*
elly: Um, caz.... i think i might have to go - for, a while...
Beckett: What she means, lass...
Caz: *raises eyebrows*
Beckett: Is that she's trying on shoes.
just - :o
GT: i have to stop drinking so much...
*Daniel passes out*
Khalek: I'll have what he's having.
*attaches new sign to the door that says, "rompus room"
Beckett: *to Caz* Care for a romp?
Caz: I thought you wanted a scratching post...
omg that hillarious!
*elly tries on several pairs of shoes*
Oma: Every Ancient outpost must have a "ROMPus room"
*Caz takes off Beckett's shoes*
*Caz puts on Beckett's shoes*
Beckett: It was a metaphor...
omg that was cleaver than i thought
Nuby: *manic* Where's the cleaver?
*all back away*
elly: evening wear, day wear, causal wear....
*Nuby dates a cleaver*
elly: only if there are no sheep left wear
Daniel: Sheep (6)
Elly: you can't date an adjective!
*narrator adds that a cleaver is a KNIFE*
Nuby: reeee reeee reeee
Beckett: Is he trying to imitate Norman Bates?
Norman Bates: Pathetic.
*the room cringes in sympathy pain*
*what has Nuby lopped off?*
Caz: THAT'S IT
*Caz fwaps the narrator - !*
*elly, rodney and ba'al migrate to the pink couch*
*Beckett grabs Caz*
*Beckett throws Caz onto black leather couch*
elly: a woman can never have enough shoes
Caz: I only have one pair and they're well worn.
elly: STOP TALKING
elly: it does nothing for your feet
Daniel: *realisation hits*
Daniel: SO FEET ARE -
Daniel: FEET ARE -
*Daniel faints again*
daniel: I'm sensing this isn't about shoes
Sherlock Holmes: No shit.
Caz: Isn't that usually...huh?
oma: well, you know what they say about hands...
*the room pauses*
Beckett: Well ye gotta have a big handful...
zelenka: uh oh
*elly chokes* I'M SORRY?
*has this Late Nights crossed into a the Final Frontier, a higher rating?!?!*
well, we did just spend the entire convo talking about - shoe sizes and carpet...
Beckett: In Furling culture, Furling's hands match their mate's...
Oma: Is that the only thing in your vocab, Caz?
Caz: Well in the kitchen...
Zelenka: Leather. Is sticky.
Oma: what were you doing with the leather?
Zelenka: Leather. Is sticky. With oil.
Caz: Um no comments about the leather while Beckett ties me down to it.
oma: NO! BAD ZELENKA!
elly: you want the chocolate?
Jon Edwards: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Caz: Chocolate?! WHERE?!
elly: oma has it
elly: she ran out of caramel
*Zelenka looks at chocolate*
*he wrinkles his nose*
ba'al: i got the strawberry
*Oma pulls out a carrot stick*
*Zelenka runs at carrot stick*
Caz: THAT WAS MY STRAWBERRY!
Oma: who's a good bunny?
Zelenka: Me me me
Caz: If I wasn't tied down I'd fight you for t.
elly: stay out of it cotton tail
*Beckett advances on Caz*
zelenka: but i don't have a *beam* darn...
Caz: I feel I should cry for help.
Daniel: I'm so confused.
*ELIZABETH WEIR RUNS
INTO THE BACKDROP*
ba'al and rodney advance with strawberry sauce
*it falls over again*
*curtain descends on the Immunity playhouse*
Nuby: IT fell over again? *looks down*
okay, so theatre could have been a better choice
*what, exactly, fell down?*
Caz: Playhouse? Why - oomf!
*Beckett is snogging Caz*
*also has case of the MEA -*
elly is - busy...
um night caz!
Beckett: MEANDERING HANDS (6)
must go to sleep while in great mood lmao!
GT: MEA MEA MEA - *faints*
elly: your day will come
*a female technician appears*
*this defies Stargate Laws*
*thus ending conversation*
*Beckett picks up Caz and takes her into a private room*
i think this qualifies as Late Nights - your thoughts?
it's very risque this one
lmao i asked you first!
we never actually said - anything...
*the playhouse falls down*
GT: Damn this budget.
*the screen starts fading*
Beckett turned to the camera and said - looking dishevelled -